I’m hoping you’ve never been in a car crash or hurricane, or worse, but, you might have your own weighty memories or situations from the past. Some people’s past haunts them as they replay situations over and over, have bad dreams or, worst of all internalise it, and live a new way that preserves the pain.
Simplifying the morass is easy enough; the past is gone, nobody can change it. Now is what matters. Building an empire on regret or revenge dooms you to lifelong unhappiness.
Overcoming bad effects of the past takes practice and persistence though so keep at it and you’ll surely get there. After all, refusing to quit is one good way to make sure you ultimately succeed.
There are many excellent books on the method and this post is just a summary. I’d certainly recommend reading (or re-reading) The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle to thoroughly master this topic.
Start to defuse unhelpful emotions about the past by recognising what happened, agreeing it’s over and accepting that the past can never be changed.
Focus on the present, today, this very moment. Chances are you are warm, safe and dry. Probably mostly healthy and not hungry. And you’re alive. That’s a great place to be.
Consider using meditation as a tool to calm the mind.
Stop wishing, resenting, hating or any other emotion about what might have been or how you and other people behaved. That was only creates your own personal Hell.
Develop a habit of seeing the good. After a while you’ll be able to see good in the smallest of things and use the approach as a way to tune out life’s mundane pressures.
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